How You Can Support Your Student’s Mental Health
Everyone has mental health, but mental health looks different for everybody. Families are diverse, and each member has their own unique experience at any given time. Celebrating differences, making space for one another, listening openly, resolving conflicts, and not being afraid to make mistakes are key pieces in the foundation for supporting mental health in your family.
Supporting mental health in your family doesn’t end when your student goes to college. Here are four steps you can take to support your student’s mental health (while they are at UArizona and beyond):
1. Build a Foundation of Self-Awareness for Yourself
Learning how you personally navigate ups and downs in life can give you clues about how to support your student through their own ups and downs. Journaling, quiet time for self-reflection, and talking about your experiences are great places to begin.
2. Check In Regularly
Check in, even when everything looks fine. When you do, focus on your student as a person, not just a student. Ask about something you know is going on, an important event or relationship, or how they're reacting to something in the world or your family.
3. Listen. It Does More Than You May Think.
When someone shares something with us, a human instinct is to want to act – especially when we care about them! The trouble is, you can’t always assume what that person wants. They may just want a listening ear, to process something out loud, validation or reassurance, or they may want pros and cons, solutions, opinions, ideas.
Start by listening and then ask, “How can I support you in this?” When you truly listen to your student, you’re helping them feel seen and heard.
4. Have the Hard Conversations When You Need To
Talking about things that are difficult like family relationships, mental health challenges, mistakes, worries, frustrations, and failure is never comfortable, but it is crucial to building deeper connections and strengthening our relationships. Showing your student that you’re willing to talk about uncomfortable things leaves the door open for them to share their struggles and ask for help.
If you’re not sure how to start the hard conversation, remember CARE.
C: Connect one-on-one if possible. If that moment is not a good time to talk, arrange a time when you can have a more in-depth conversation.
During that conversation, let your student know you care and/or are concerned. It can help to ground the conversation in a specific incident or example of a concerning behavior. A simple, “Do you remember when” can be an effective way to start the conversation. Use I statements like, “I noticed, I wondered, I felt…” Once you’re talking, let the conversation be about your student and that you are there to listen and help.
A: Practice active listening during this conversation. Minimize distractions, use open and welcoming body language, reflect what you hear, ask open ended questions, and be patient.
R: Respond with compassion to whatever comes up. It’s okay to say that you understand where they are coming from and are also concerned. If you are ever concerned about something serious like suicide, know that it’s okay to ask about that too.
E: Encourage help. Suggest resources and encourage your student to get help. Campus Health’s Counseling & Psych Services (CAPS) offers a wide range of mental health supportive resources and services. Share the CAPS appointments page with your student or tell them about a self-care resource they may like.
As a parent, family member, or guardian, you have a unique role to play in your student’s well-being and experience of college. Please remember that no one has all the answers. If you are ever unsure of how to help your student or connect them with resources, you can call CAPS at 520-621-3334 for a free Parents Matter consultation. We want your student to succeed in life just as much as you do, and we're here to help you help them.
Learn more about how you can support your student.